self

Confidently allow yourself to be poised,
and your words be graceful in every response you give.
[Colossians 4:6 | Paraphrased]
I have been looking through old pictures this evening, and this picture is a glimpse of my earlier years when I was in high school and way before I knew what “ooooh boyfriend” or “ooooh shopping with friends!” type of attitude.
Continue reading “self”

firm strength and everlasting peace

My heart aches so much when I hear those I love losing someone they deeply love. When you have someone constantly present and they quickly become someone who is immediately absent. You learn to cling onto the memories you want to remember. The goodness of it all, the words left unsaid, or the words they regretfully said. Everything seems like a blur and I just cannot fathom how someone who continually reads an empty book filled with blank pages, and allowing ignorance in their hearts to not believe in conversations to God who will always listen. That is the beauty of prayer which is a powerful substance: to feel full again. Admitting there is a Heavenly Father who brings grace and mercy through all this hardship, and an emptiness no man can fill.

Continue reading “firm strength and everlasting peace”

Letter One

Here it is! One of the five letters. I generally put the dates in bold and in brackets. Due to my own “dignity” of sorts, I’d like to keep that private.

I wrote this poem a while ago. At the time I was so upset that my “feelings” were still lingering inside me after that period of time, and I was even more frustrated because emotions are beautiful yet hard because your mind becomes blindsided and not realistic. I was also frustrated because feelings can become familiar, familiarity comes along with having comfort and having a state of being comfortable (without any good intention) is not healthy. Years have passed and I realize we all learn through past experiences and I am thankful that I am more aware of God’s desires than my own desires. I am aware of learning to be humble in everything I do. I hope. Continue reading “Letter One”

a collective thought

clouds-1523617
Photo by Dan Petru-

Or pertaining to a specific subject…

Hi! 🙂 I have something exciting to share with you real soon. These past years since I lived in the wonderful South. I have been writing poems and/or thoughts of a particular situation which I never felt I had closure about, or had the confidence to share outside of my realm of family and dearest friends. I have put a lot of prayer into these poems whether I should share them with you. I had to pull the string and not allow my indecisiveness compel me to back out on an opportunity to share a hardship I thought would never end and let someone out there know they aren’t alone. God has recently given me the freedom to fly, learning to be “Misha” again, and having an overwhelming sigh of relief for finally having a clean slate. It is quite refreshing!

Continue reading “a collective thought”

to be absent

Renew goodness within us in the purest way. |Psalm 51:10 | Paraphrased|

Everyone gets so busy with their own schedules, and when their schedule doesn’t work. It obviously is a setback…
When I think of this (Psalm 51:10) Bible verse, I think of His goodness, He created us and He is molding us to be the best we can be, but we cling to our ways to what ‘checks us out’

of our spiritual comfort zone…

Continue reading “to be absent”

discomfort

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.
[Ecclesiastes 3:1]
 
This Bible verse has been on my heart tonight. Hearing news with a loss of a loved one and an absence of a loved one from various church members makes me mourn for their tired eyes and what they are going through this trying time. It’s naturally unfair. We don’t choose death or choose to push people away. We love them, we want them to stay. Having our loved ones there and present brings joy in our hearts because it’s safe.

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hearts contentment

[2:30am thoughts]
Will I ever have the contentment that I am where I am for a reason?
Why do people find joy for putting someone down?
I am aware that I am so loved, but I don’t feel loved at all. I feel OKAY.
Why am I still up?
I’m thinking about the past too much.
Will I get to work on time? [fast forward: no]
Will I find the joy of always being available to do church events?
Will I be able to have this many opportunities in the future? Continue reading “hearts contentment”